2 weeks ago at this very moment during the day, I was getting my ankle set in the ER.
It has been a looooooooooong 2 weeks since I broke my ankle.
Until this past Sunday, I had been crashing with the BP at HQ...though it had been in the plans for me to head back to the farm for a few days. I was, to say the least, a little nervous about being there all on my own. I've spent a few days on my own since the break, and I've managed ok...but the farm is in the middle of nowhere, with anyone to come help a least a short distance away. So nervous is a modest description of what I was. But at the same time, I was looking forward to some peace and quiet, and getting to chill and watch some TV. So Sunday morning I packed my stuff, and collected some food...and we headed off. A short stop at Walmart for some additional food...and it was on to the farm to get me settled.
Once there, I really didn't do much, except spend my time crashing on the couch...and then for a change of scenery, move to my chair, and watch TV. I was supposed to be doing this thing called "relaxing." I guess you could say that was accomplished.
But let me back up a little. As I mentioned already, it has been a long 2 weeks. First off, I have been given orders to not really do much of...well...anything. But I'm a little stubborn, and I really dislike relying on anyone else for...well...anything.
I swear...I come by this stubbornness honestly. I actually got a double dose of stubborn. My maternal grandmother was the queen of stubborn. She was the absolute worst one about asking for help, or accepting any help offered to her, long after she shouldn't be doing things for herself. Including cooking, cleaning, and driving. And my paternal grandmother is not far behind her. In fact, the morning after I broke my ankle, my dad called to tell me that he had called her earlier in the morning to tell her what happened...and she had already been out not once but TWICE to sweep and shovel snow off her front walk because she didn't want the paper boy to slip on the snow. Never mind the fact that her granddaughter just broke her ankle on the snow. Or that she's a spry 88 years old. Nope...she needed to get that snow off the walk. So she did.
See...told you so :)
Double dose of stubborn.
And I am normally a very independent person as far as taking care of myself. So even though throughout the entire process, I am trying to keep a positive attitude...because surely SOMETHING good must come out of this...right? Well even though overall I'm trying to have that attitude, there are definitely days and moments that I don't succeed. One of the worst days was when I tried to make breakfast, and it took me a half an hour to make a bowl of oatmeal for the BP and a bowl of applesauce with granola in it for myself. Yes...a half an hour to do just that. I cried that day because there is just so much that I physically can't do right now...or if I try...it takes 18 times longer than it normally would take me to do something. And the amount of energy I expend trying to do anything is so high I'm wiped out after the simplest of tasks. So frustrated has been my mental state many times.
But people have been very supportive also. A couple from my church emailed last week and then stopped by Wednesday with a refrigerator full of food that our Sunday School class had collected for us. Very helpful, and very awesome. I cannot thank them all enough!!
But back to the farm...
As mentioned in my previous post...I have been taking a bath for the past couple of weeks because it's kinda just easier. But I was not happy doing so. So at the farm, I knew I would be able to get in the shower/bath with no problem. And I decided yesterday to just give showering a shot. I got a garbage bag, and put it over my cast, and wrapped it tight. And then proceeded to balance on one foot for as long as it took to wash my hair, and everything else. I felt awesome finally showering. But I needed a nap after. See...a lot of energy was expended. And I took another one this morning. Just thinking about it makes me smile. There is just nothing like a good, hot shower.
So, since I was so successful at showering yesterday, I thought I would try something else I hadn't done in the past 2 weeks. Making dinner, by myself, from scratch. Now...I'm not bad in the kitchen. Though I have had a few...challenges. Like setting my kitchen on fire at both Thanksgiving and Christmas 2 years ago. I figured I wasn't making anything terribly difficult...just chicken and pasta. How challenging could that be? Surely nothing could go wrong. Right?
WRONG!!!
The stove in my kitchen is not new...and it has metal burner covers...that most of the time I just move around when I'm using a burner. So I had had the chicken cooking for a while...and wanted to get the water on to boil. Well first...getting a full stock pot of water onto the stove was one huge challenge. But I made it. I had set it on the stove...moved myself. Then moved it onto the burner. But I checked on it a couple of times...and it just wasn't boiling yet. And then the smoke detector went off. I knew I had just cleaned the burners a couple of weeks ago...so I shouldn't be burning anything there. But they kept going off. And the water STILL wasn't boiling. And I was getting tired and frustrated because I had already been cooking for an hour and a half...making what seems like a million trips into the kitchen...and the darn smoke detectors kept going off!! I finally realized that when I had moved the stock pot....one of the burner covers got stuck to the bottom of the pan. It wasn't ruined...but that was the cause of my problems. So I removed that...and then it wasn't too much longer before dinner was done. But by the time I was finally able to eat, I was a wreck because of what a catastrophe it had been cooking. And I was exhausted. I was barely able to make it into the kitchen one last time to clean up and put away leftovers. But I got my stubborn up, and wouldn't let that stupid dinner beat me! Plus...I had to save the leftovers so I wouldn't have to go through that nightmare again anytime soon :)
I was so exhausted by the time I was done with everything, I collapsed on the couch for an hour before I could muster the energy to make it to bed, and take a pain pill, and get some much needed sleep.
More than one time over the past 2 weeks, I have been more thankful for pockets than I have ever been before in my life. And also, more than once, I have felt like a kangaroo, because those hooded sweatshirts I am so fond of wearing have that awesome front pocket that I have loaded down because a couple of cans of soda, a phone, keys, and inevitably something else have been stuffed in there. Hey...a girl has to do what a girl has to do. And sometimes stuffing pockets full of something is the easiest way of transporting things through the house.
The one task I hadn't tried until today was driving. It's my left ankle that's broken, so driving is something I knew I should be able to do by myself. I just haven't done it. The BP came to get me today...and told me that I was driving back. OK...I can totally do that. Before we even got on the highway, I was wishing I didn't have to do that. I was a little uncomfortable. But still stubborn. And more than once I wanted to pull over and let him drive. But he wasn't going to let me get off that easy. Nor did I really want to give up. He had to help me do some deep breathing a couple of times...and he may or may not have gotten me to howl at passing vehicles...I felt ridiculous...but it made me laugh and kept my mind off of my ankle and I made it all the way back. And then promptly laid down to take a nap. But I now feel confident that when I need to drive myself, I will be able to. YAY!! Independence!!
So...next steps. I go back to see my awesome orthopedic surgeon on Thursday afternoon. He'll take the current cast/bandage off, and remove the staples and do some x-rays to check the progress...and see how much like Wolverine I am becoming. (That being the running joke...that I'm now transforming into Wolverine...with metal attached to my bones and all) Then its back to the farm for a few days...and then off to sunny Florida!! I bought my ticket last night, and Monday morning I am blowing this popsicle stand for a few weeks!! That's really been the plan all along, and had my Dr. allowed me to travel anytime in the first 2 weeks after surgery, I would already have been there. But he said no, so in frosty IL I remain. But I'm definitely looking forward to it. The park in Florida has always been the place I have been able to relax. Plus, my parents are there, and I miss them terribly. It's been hard on me not having them...because no matter how awesome other people are at helping out...NO ONE equals your parents...no matter how old you are. And they have been having a hard time not being here to help take care of me. So I'm definitely excited about that!!
Ok...that's it for now. I'm off to lay down and take a pain pill and relax the evening away :) Until next time....
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